There's no escaping
Krawi
at
7:47 PM
I am self-proclaiming to be the Interview Queen who couldn't get a real job in well known companies because of reasons I couldn't fathom. And by real job I do not mean to include call centers (no matter how prestigious they may be) and small businesses in need of flunkies who would settle for a dime in exchange for their honest labor. Call me stupid for maintaining a standard fresh graduates of today ought not be thinking about. Shoot me for being tooooo ambitious. Judge me guilty for wanting to pursue a career in a well-known company in the real estate/food and beverage/hospitality industry that pays a little more than minimum wage.
As I face the computer, fervently pounding on the keyboard, the other side of my brain is rounding up words that would make up a great application letter. I am once again applying... but for an international company no one's ever heard of. It isn't my nature but I'm sensing positive vibrations about this. If by having a great feeling about a potential job offer sends someone straight to heaven then I'm in Nirvana right now. I am well aware of my current unemployed situation - something that never should've happened had I decided to wait until the end of the month. This isn't something a normal 20-something fresh graduate should be feeling having quit from a really really high-paying company after only a week of training and turned down what could've evolved into a lucrative web-based career.
My parents don't know that my call center career already ended before it even began. Ironically, I realized what a disaster of an agent I would have been after receiving several text messages from my mom pushing me to go on. Obviously it didn't push me enough. What was supposed to be words of encouragement made me realize how wrong the path I was beginning to take was. A friend shared an advice from her father - about quitting not because you're stressed but because the job isn't making you happy anymore. My week in the call center taught me well, taught me enough. I was contemplating resignation after my first day and telling my batchmates about my plans of letting go. I wasn't happy even from the beginning. At least I can really say I am not cut out for it.
I am paying the price for being choosy (and I am talking about superlatives here!) and idealistic. I am unemployed and too absorbed in the drama of it all. I refuse to quit yet I don't know what the heck to do and where to go next.
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